Create & be vulnerable.

August 25th, 2011

The production stage of my self-publishing journey is coming to an end. Within a few days, The Healer will be live on all the major online retail sites. You’ll be able to walk into a bookstore anywhere in the world and ask the shopkeeper to order it in for you (I’m looking at you, friends in Tokyo and Mumbai). Soon I’ll be posting a list of all the different ways you can purchase a copy of my book; check back soon for details.

Adding “published author” to my list of accomplishments is a dream come true—and bringing this dream to fruition has cost me a fortune, not to mention plenty of sleepless nights spinning out my sci-fi tale. And very soon this tale will be available for purchase on Amazon and Barnes & Noble and at a bookstore near you.  

Given how long I’ve dreamt about launching my novel into the marketplace, why am I so nervous at the very moment this dream is about to come true? And given my nerves, why am I still counting the days until I can tweet out that first link to my Amazon listing?

The only other time I’ve experienced this confusing cocktail of vulnerability, pain, anticipation, and fulfillment was the day I gave birth to my daughter. In the thick of labour, I wanted to hurry up and just get it over with—because it really, really hurt! But now I can hardly remember the pain (which lasted 37 hours); in fact, I’m looking forward to doing it all again someday.

Perhaps all worthwhile creation must be accompanied by a certain degree of pain.

Soon a very private creative journey will become uncomfortably public. Two years of toil and turmoil and love—so much love—will be public. This vulnerability is of my own choosing. My dream is for strangers to read The Healer. All I can do is trust that the love that went into crafting my tale is enough to inspire readers to follow through to the last word. If you get there, please email me and let me know what you think.

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